"I Killed Janet" is an unreleased song recorded by members of False Front with Gene Ween. Probably recorded some time in the early 90s, the song is notable for being the only time Guy Heller and Gene Ween have shared vocals on a recording.[1]
The origin of "I Killed Janet" was from an instrumental tape created by Joanne Racciatti (guitarist/drummer of False Front), which she created while attending college in Washington state.[1] Most of the instrumental tracks heard in the final recording are from that tape and were written and played by Racciatti alone.[1] Racciatti had studied music under Robert Fripp of King Crimson, and so the "I Killed Janet" guitar tracks were done in Fripp's New Standard Tuning.[1]
Racciatti sent the instrumental tape to her then-bandmate Guy Heller, who brought it to Gene Ween to collaborate on.[1] Gene overdubbed a guitar track onto the song, which required him to learn to play in New Standard Tuning, something that did not come easily for him.[1]
Heller's phone-recorded vocal track was done in one take.[1]According to Heller, "I envisioned a man coming home to find his wife having sex with another man. I thought it deserved to be dark. It's a tune that's a real bummer to hear. Very effective."[1]
The sung choruses later in the song are by Heller and Gene Ween together, the only time the two singers have ever shared vocals on a recording.[1]
Part 1: Phone conversation
GUY: Hello? Hello?
GENE: Hello, yeah?
GUY: Did I wake you up, man?
GENE: Yeah, who is this?
GUY: I’m really sorry. I’m really sorry I woke you the fuck up.
GENE: Yeah, what are you— what are you doing? What’s goin’ on? It’s late.
GUY: You should see it. [???] Real bad.
GENE: What happened? What’s goin’ on? What happened?
GUY: Have you ever seen beauty before? Have you ever seen real beauty? She’s pretty, man. That’s why I married her, because she’s so fuckin’ pretty. Even when she bleeds she’s pretty.
GENE: What’s goin’ on? Where is she?
GUY: [???] But he doesn’t look so pretty when he bleeds, ‘cause [???] You know, it’s Janet’s birthday today.
GENE: Yeah, what’s the matter?
GUY: I brought her flowers, and I don’t think she likes them, ‘cause she’s dead.
GENE: She’s dead?
GUY: I killed both of them and [???]
GENE: Oh, man…
GUY: It’s her birthday.
GENE: Oh, man…
GUY: [?] …flowers… [?]
GENE: Listen, where are you?
GUY: You got to come here.
GENE: Yeah. I’m gonna come right over.
GUY: Don’t let anybody [follow?] you. Don’t call the cops on me. Please don’t call the cops on me. [???] Please, don’t call the cops on me.
GENE: Yeah, ok. [???]
GUY: Just don’t call the cops, please, not yet.
GENE: Yeah, I’m comin’ over right now, man.[?]
GUY: You [didn’t see?] it man, you’re not gonna like me. [?] Beautiful, even when she’s dead. But don’t let anybody know. Don’t let anybody know. Okay.
GENE: Okay[?]
Part 2: Chorus (3x - Guy & Gene)
Don’t hang up the phone, I think I’m in trouble now
I’ve never gone this far before
Lucifer laughed when I pulled the trigger
Now I know why we never had kids
Part 3: Spoken ending (Guy)
By the power invested [sic] in me, I now pronounce you man and wife.
By the power invested [sic] in me, I now pronounce you man and wife.
Man and wife.
Man and wife.
’Til death do you part.
You may kiss the bride.
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